Even when you thought I wasn't looking, I was watching you at your end of year school concert.
When everyone was nervously watching at the start, laughing at the humour and cheering at the end, I was watching you.
You stood out from the other 90 children, like the shinest, brightest star in the sky. I know of course where the last seven years have gone, but still it seems unbelievable that you were standing there looking so grown up. Sitting, listening, narrating in your own mature way.
You were unswayed by distractions, still in your seat. Listening, watching, doing what you knew was right. Somehow you've always been like this at school, but you stood out for it so much today. While other children were fidgeting, trying to talk, you just sat, quietly. Maturely.
And I was so proud. So unbelievably proud of you. I don't know how you are who you are, whether you were always going to be this way, or if it's because of us. It doesn't seem possible that I am even in a small way responsible for you, the brilliant, funny, articulate, healthy you that you are.
And still and always, my heart could've burst today, watching you. All the way through, sometimes out of the corner of my eye, sometimes facing you square on.
Sometimes with a smile, and sometimes with tears in my eyes. You were brilliant my boy, you always are.